(Ding, ding, ding!!) Welcome ladies and gentlemen to tonight's main event! The following contest is a three round bout. In this corner, the challenger in the blue bottle lid, is a bottle of warm milk. Looking to make a name for himself by taking down the champ, he weighs in at a whopping 5 ounces.
In this corner, the champion with the golden brown tan and spiky hair, Jarod James!! The champion of 2 and a half months tips the scales at 13 pounds and 7 ounces. He "stands" (with help) at a towering 24 inches. He has a BMI of 16.4°/· and a head circumference of 15.5".
And the referee has signaled for the start of the match and here we go!! The bottle looks like it might be a tough match do the champ. Jarod James opens with some feints....and WHOA! What a right hand! A wicked, thunderous haymaker and down goes the bottle!! No need for a 10 count, the bottle has nothing left in the tank! It is OVER! Good night, everyone! Stay tuned for your local news.
